On old friends…

Spent the last weekend, in the company of friends old and new… It was to say the least, incredibly enlightening. To be pleasantly surprised that we’ve all changed and matured into relatively well-adjusted individuals. We spent most of Saturday night dining al-fresco, under the stars and a light breeze blowing… We talked and laughed and joked, as if there was never a gap in the time we spent together. Older and wiser certainly, but with the same good graces and humor… What more could I ask for?

Nothing like good food and good company to make you feel better, eh?

There was several old friends, whom we haven’t seen in over 3 years, with a refreshing new outlook on life. There were several newer good friends too, and it was interesting to watch the old meld into new…

Inspired by the weekend’s success, I sought out to reconnect with friends from an even older ‘collection’, those friends from school. With neo-modern tools such as Friendster and Facebook, I had no excuse not to have kept in touch with these people. After all, we spent our formative years together, nevermind the fact I spent most of it scheming how to escape from school…

Investing about ten minutes of my time, I found about half a dozen people from those days, most of whom I no longer keep in touch with… I was never really a social butterfly to begin with, and pretty much kept to myself in those schooling days, but it warmed the cockles of my heart to see their pictures again, and to know what’s happening in their lives…

I do feel apprehensive though, when crunch time came, and the question of whether to ‘add to list of friends’ popped up. It occured to me, there must be a reason for them to be avoiding me all this while (even if they’re only avoiding me in my over-active imagination). If it took me mere minutes to track them down, wouldn’t they have been able to do the same? Would they accept my request to reconnect?

My over-analyzing mind decided that, maybe they really are avoiding me… I wonder what I did to make it so.

The little voice of reason in my head then chided me, “No lah, people just fall out of touch over time…” I’m waiting with bated breath on the results of my requests, and hope that they don’t turn me down… Rejection smacks too much of school days, when I was pretty much a wallflower because I didn’t want to be told that they don’t want to be my friend. I always thought I was a bit of a freak, and as a result didn’t talk to people much…

To those friends, wherever you may be, I wish you well and hope you’ve had and will have a good life. Even if its just by selling refrigerators to Eskimos… My deepest and most heartfelt apology, if I had offended you in any way, or taken advantage of our friendship… I also apologize, if I had knowingly or unknowingly judged upon your choices – may it be in relationships and life choices, to something as simple as what to have in McDonalds… My faults are entirely my own, and by knowing each and everyone of you, my life has been enriched beyond measure…

My missive today is dedicated to Julia, a good friend I had when I was in school. Perhaps we bonded because we were each in our way, a little ‘different’ from the other girls then… Congratulations on your upcoming wedding to Taufik, welcome home and may you have a fulfilling and happy life together…

Looking forward to making contact again, with the people who have made me into what I am today – Jasmine.

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